What are your Laws of Astronomy?

[bosun21]

3 hours ago, markse68 said:

The best clear nights are always accompanied by a full moon

The amount of times this occurs surpasses the statistical law of chance 😤

[Sunshine]

1. No matter how many times I say I don't need another scope, there will always be another.

2. My wife will always say without fail "what is wrong with the other two telescopes" 

3. Once I buy the other telescope I WILL say to myself "this is it, no more telescopes"

4. See number 1

[bosun21]

Treble check that you HAVE everything with you when visiting a dark sky site. As I can no longer drive I arranged for a friend and neighbor to drive me the hour and a half to a dark site. Only when I watched his tail lights fade into the distance did I suddenly realize that I had left my eyepiece case at home! I didn’t have a solitary eyepiece with me. That’s been my most miserable night with only my neutered telescope as company for 4 hours in the dark. My friend on his return laughed uncontrollably. Sigh!

[CraigT82]

Just now, bosun21 said:

Treble check that you HAVE everything with you when visiting a dark sky site. As I can no longer drive I arranged for a friend and neighbor to drive me the hour and a half to a dark site. Only when I watched his tail lights fade into the distance did I suddenly realize that I had left my eyepiece case at home! I didn’t have a solitary eyepiece with me. That’s been my most miserable night with only my neutered telescope as company for 4 hours in the dark. My friend on his return laughed uncontrollably. Sigh!

Oh my this is horrendous! What a miserable 4 hours

[Beulah]

A dark sky area with no light pollution is oft beset with clouds

[Zermelo]

1 hour ago, bosun21 said:

Treble check that you HAVE everything with you when visiting a dark sky site. As I can no longer drive I arranged for a friend and neighbor to drive me the hour and a half to a dark site. Only when I watched his tail lights fade into the distance did I suddenly realize that I had left my eyepiece case at home! I didn’t have a solitary eyepiece with me. That’s been my most miserable night with only my neutered telescope as company for 4 hours in the dark. My friend on his return laughed uncontrollably. Sigh!

Now, that's provoked a thought that I won't be able to suppress until I do something about it.

I'm in the habit of leaving lots of spares, like biros, tissues, pain killers and bags of loose change, in various places like car glove compartments and rucksack pockets, just in case I get caught without when I'm out.  So, should I buy a spare "emergency" budget zoom eyepiece, at least for the car I would use for transporting to outreach or dark sites, on the off chance that I forget to take the eyepiece case? It's probably one of the less plausible excuses ever dreamt up.

 

[dobblob]

Never shop online for astronomical equipment after consuming a bottle of wine/six beers/ six double vodkas.

Always have a responsible adult near by......

[Andy ES]

Another law says:

A beautiful clear night guarantees that the series on TV I am required to watch with Mrs will be on.

”An offer I can’t refuse”😁

Having said that I will always put my family’s wants and needs before Astronomy. (Most of the time)👍

[Ibbo!]

2 hours ago, Stu said:

Ooh, controversial. I think this could kick off a healthy debate with @Ibbo! about the concept of ‘over socking’ 🤣

Yes do not exceed critical sock mass.

[Moonshed]

29 minutes ago, Ibbo! said:

Yes do not exceed critical sock mass.

Because if you did it would result in a massive black hole that would deform the fabric of the sock space continuum.

[Zermelo]

2 minutes ago, Moonshed said:

Because if you did it would result in a massive black hole that would deform the fabric of the sock space continuum.

Do not exceed the Chandrasockar limit

 

[saac]

"The Invariance Law of Telescope Availability".    It does not matter where you are or how you got there but the likelihood that you are co located with your telescope is inversely proportional to the darkness and clarity of the night sky.    

As a birthday treat we have abandoned the kids (legally they are 20 something adults) and driven off to the deepest darkest part of  Scotland for a longish weekend of hill walking. We are up at the Falls of Dochart in Killin by Loch Tay.  It is absolutely dark as sin outside and the clarity of the sky is glorious. Of course I didn't think of packing a telescope - doh.  

Having to rely on Mk 1 eyeball - here's a photograph of the approaching night fall - if you squint closely (zoom in) you can see Jupiter and Venus (iphone capture).  Darn it where is my telescope!!!!!!

Jim

Edited March 4, 2023 by saac

[jjohnson3803]

If it's cloudy when you go to bed it will be clear well before dawn, especially if the forecast calls for morning clouds and you decide to sleep in.

If it's clear in the morning when you leave for work and you hope to have an evening observing session, it will be cloudy by the time you leave work in the evening.

If you phone weather app says it's cloudy, it's mostly clear outside.

The neighbor will turn on all their outdoor lights and let their brain damaged dog out randomly at any time between 21.00 and 05.00.

If a neighbor leaves for the weekend, they will leave on as many lights as possible for the duration.

Best to always look out the window when making any observing decision.

 

 

 

 

Edited March 5, 2023 by jjohnson3803

[markse68]

57 minutes ago, jjohnson3803 said:

If you phone weather app says it's cloudy, it's mostly clear outside.

there’s a saying that if you have 2 thermometers you don’t know what the temperature is- it’s the same with weather apps- they never agree!

Mark

[SteveNickolls]

The Golden Rule-"When it's clear-image".

Cheers,

Steve 

[Marvin Jenkins]

On 03/03/2023 at 20:17, Zermelo said:

Do not exceed the Chandrasockar limit

 

That limit is ultimately defined when you can no longer get your boots on!

Although there is a space time anomaly that can be utilised by simply wearing bigger boots.

This ratio of multiple socks increasing in layers to be accommodated by ever increasing boot size could lead to an unstable irregularity called “Clown feet”.

Marv

[Marvin Jenkins]

My personal laws of astronomy are similar to fight club.

1/ don’t talk about astronomy (eyes roll)

2/ don’t talk about astronomy (yawns)

3/ don’t talk about astronomy, do it when you can then go on about for ever getting the results from laws 1 and 2.

[Ratlet]

If you ask 10 astronomers for recommendations for eyepieces you'll get 17 different answers.

If you ask 10 astronomers for a recommendation for a scope, you'll get 34 answers.  No matter what you pick you'll end up thinking "maybe I should have got a dob". 

If you did get a dob you'll end up thinking "maybe I should have gotten a bigger dob".

Reliable eyepiece reviews will almost always feature a wooden ruler.

[Pixies]

No Cloud

No Wind

No Moon

 

Pick 2

[Mognet]

It's guaranteed clear when you have other priorities

[DaveS]

All clear nights forecast will disappear and cloud over by the time you get to them.

I've come to the opinion that the "ground state" of British weather is cloud, any clear sky is an unstable exited state that will soon decay back to the ground state.

[Ratlet]

7 minutes ago, DaveS said:

All clear nights forecast will disappear and cloud over by the time you get to them.

I've come to the opinion that the "ground state" of British weather is cloud, any clear sky is an unstable exited state that will soon decay back to the ground state.

I would expand this idea, incorporating the recently developed ideas of Messrs Heisenberg and Bohr and propose the following:

1.  The ground state of British skies is cloudy.  Clear skies exist as an excited state.

2.  Prior to the skies being observed they exist as a superposition of states.

3.  The act of observation causes the system to collapse to the ground state.

I am currently collaborating with other amatuer astronomers to investigate this idea.  To the disappointment of all involved early indications are positive for the model.

I propose this idea be known as the "Plum Pudding model of Astronomy", linking back to earlier work by J. J. Thomson on the basis that any attempts to conduct astronomical observations will likely result in the observer feeling like a plum pudding.

[markse68]

it works the other way too- planned meets get cancelled due to forecast as keeps happening, only for the clouds to clear revealing gobsmacking transparency and seeing!

Mark

[cajen2]

Oh, one I forgot: if you've been patiently waiting for a piece of gear to come up in the classifieds, it will only happen when you're particularly skint (though this is my default setting) and/or the item is collection only from the other end of the country.

[mikeDnight]

On 03/03/2023 at 13:08, Moonshed said:

That reminds me. Back in 1999 or thereabouts when I was living in Scotland I had been a member of the local astronomical society for a few years, in fact I was the poor guy who was charged with producing the monthly newsletter. It was always my dearest wish to see the Aurora Borealis, I still haven’t! Even booked a flight a couple of years back from Norwich airport and it was cancelled at the last minute due to lack of interest! Anyway, back to the story. On this particular night the sky was lit up with the most breathtaking display that had been seen in Scotland for decades. Guess what, even though it was only 11.00 pm they didn’t bother to phone me, only the three that run the association phoned each other. Their excuse was they didn’t want to wake me up, the truth is they didn’t want to waste 5 mins calling a few people each when they could be out there getting wonderful photos. At the next meeting, in the same week as it happens, the three of them came in carrying stacks of incredible photos of the Aurora.
That’s when I quit.

That’s a problem I have run into a number of times (I have moved house over 20 times) that some astronomical associations can be very cliquish. Such a shame because it shouldn’t be like that. However, there are many really good societies thankfully.

 

  That's really sad, and shame on them for not having a system in place for informing the clan. If it makes you feel better, I've seen some spectacular Aurora from the Lancashire/Yorkshire border on more than one occasion. I can pretty much guarantee this though - If you leave us all your phone number, I'm sure you'll never miss any astro event, or indeed have a full nights sleep ever again. ☎️