Now, in the general scheme of things i like to think i can regularly out shine a low watt bulb. I know my brother would provide evidence to the contrary but, as i keep telling my son, uncle Ian smells.

So, having done a degree which had electronics in it somewhere I decided to bravely copy someone elses good work and make a parraalllllel (never could spell that) port controlled focuser.

I ordered all the bits and waited..and waited, then phoned up the delivery company got them to deliver it to an address they could find and finally everything was in place to banish bluriness.

i had the stepper motor, the opto isolators, the transistors, LEDs and the thing to wire it all to. I can´t remember what it is called so it shall hence be known as the "board with the copper tracks that doth permit the works of the devil to be done".

A perfect example of why my fledgling marketing carreer veered off the road and burst into flames.

aahh but we last left our hero, thats me in case you are confused, battling with the...board thing... and splashing lumps of solder like rabit droppings onto components.

This work of...well the word "art" springs forth from the asylum of delusion that is my brain...grew into a shiny birds nest of brilliance. Once hooked up to my modern day Indifference machine (unlike its more famous sibling the little known indifference machine can be programmed with a problem but doesn´t give a rats **** if it solves it or not and would much rather be down the pub with a pint and a fag instead of trying to figure out what 11100011010011 is....thank you very much), sprang gazelle like to life with flashing lights and a lack of smoke which brought forth joy to my heart!

It was at this point in the proceedings i decided to try the stepper motor i had bought and low a deep pit of foreboding opened in the shallows of my soul.

You see, i had completely forgotten to check which stepper i had got, the 6 lead center tapped one or the four lead one which requires, remembered from a daze of uni drunkeness, an H bridge transister congfiguration.

Unfortunately it was the one that requires an H bridge and I had built the circuit for the other better looking brother with the two extra flashy leads with go faster strips.

And thus after a Journey of Giants, sword fights and really big lizards with bad breath...we find ourselves but a mere 2 steps away from the start point with 1 artistic board, a computer that has buggered off down the pub and the ford fiesta of stepper motors which only has 4 leads.....

Ahhh I knew I should have bought the stepper motor driver chip but it seemed too good to be true...surely God would not allow the existence of such a useful chip?

Back to day dreaming and planning for the next home-made botch job for me my lad...I´ll get you next time damn you..

Neil C